Worst. Movie. Accents.

If it's Monday, it must be The Bumbles' Monday Movie Meme.  This week Molly is handing down sentences to the criminals of bad movie accents, particularly her home state's capitol/capital offenses, namely Boston. She invited us to give our take on accents you love to hate.

1.  Kevin Costner makes everyone's list for his atrocious, in-and-out British accent in 'Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves'. Where was the dialect coach for this film? Cringe factor:  5 stars, out of 5.

2.  James van der Beek, of Dawson's Creek fame, slaughtered the unique Texas accent when he starred in 'Varsity Blues'.  Cringe factor:  4 stars, out of 5.

3.  Mickey Rooney embarrassed himself and outraged every Japanese person living here, and abroad, when he attempted to sound legit as a Japanese neighbor of Holly Golightly's in 'Breakfast at Tiffany's'. Cringe factor:  4 stars, out of 5.

4.  Brad Pitt has attempted several foreign accents, but his tongue-in-cheek portrayal of a fake WWII Nazi officer in 'Inglourious Basterds' was hilarious. This is a case of when bad accents are good. Cringe factor: 5 stars, out of 5 (but in a good way).

5.  Nicole Kidman should stick to her usual non-descript American accents, because her southern accent in 'Cold Mountain' didn't quite make it. It was one of those all-purpose, one-size-fits-all, impossible-to-place dialects of the South that clueless actors seem to think will fit the bill. (Renee Zellwegger, on the other hand, got the Tennessee mountain accent perfectly.)  Cringe factor: 2 stars, out of 5.

6.  Dennis Quaid in 'The Big Easy'. Now, I loves me some hunky Dennis Quaid, even though he cheated on perky and sweet Meg Ryan and ruined her face by making her think she wasn't young enough anymore and causing her to get "duck lips", but whatever. I'm sorry, Dennis, but throwing a cher on the end of every sentence does not a N'awlins accent make. Nobody, and I mean nobody but a New Orleans native, nails that accent. It's a combination heavily influenced by French, of course, but also Spanish, German, Irish, West Indies, and Brooklyn. What? Brooklyn? The legend goes that when the yellow fever epidemic of 1796 wiped out almost all of the nuns in those parishes, nuns from Brooklyn and surrounding areas were imported to New Orleans to teach in the Catholic schools, thus adding to the unique flavor that is the New Orleans accent. If you haven't heard it first-hand, it's impossible to explain. You'll just have to go there.  Cringe factor: 4 stars, out of 5. (I'm being lenient since I think Dennis is really, really sexy.)

Addendum:  Sandy just informed me that it was the other way around with Dennis and the slut Meg...her with Russell Crowe. Geez, how did I forget about that? Well, as I said to Sandy, he was probably thinking about it...with me, of course. Meg just got around to it first. So that negates the whole reasoning for the "duck lips". Why, Meg, why did you do it?!!

Monday Movie Meme: Repeat after me...

Molly at The Bumbles has chosen Highly Quotable Movies as her theme this week. I love quotes from movies, probably because at heart I'm a plagiarist and someone else's words almost always sound better than my own.

I know it's technically a mini-series, but it's a great movie to me...just extra long...my choice is Lonesome Dove.

"I hate rude behavior in a man. I won't tolerate it."

"I'm just tryin' to keep everything in balance, Woodrow. You do more work than you got to, so it's my obligation to do less."

"Well, I'm glad I ain't scared to be lazy."

"Well, hell, boys. I'd damn sight rather be hung by my friends than by a bunch o' damn strangers."

"I'god, a man could get rich in the grave digging business around here."

"A man that will talk to a pig ain't no better than a farmer."

"Well we don't rent pigs and I figure it's better to say it right out front because a man that does like to rent pigs is... he's hard to stop."

"I never noticed you having accidents with ugly girls."

"It ain't dyin' I'm talkin' about, it's livin'."

"Well, Gus; there you go. I guess this will teach me to be more careful about what I promise people in the future."

[This list doesn't contain any of the memorable exchanges between Gus and Woodrow.]

 

You go for it, Girl!

It's been a while since I participated in The Bumbles' Monday Movie Meme. This week's theme is take-charge movie heroines...the ones who save the day, who change what's wrong into something very right. I loves me some powerful women, especially when the characters are based on the real thing. These ladies are the real thing.

Meryl Streep as Karen Silkwood in Silkwood (1983). This movie was based on the true story of Karen Silkwood, a metallurgist in a plutonium factory, who was purposely contaminated with radioactive material, psychologically tortured and most likely killed, to prevent her from exposing blatant worker safety violations. It was nominated for five Oscars and five Golden Globes. Cher won a best supporting actress Golden Globe for her portrayal as Karen's friend Dolly. Kurt Russell also starred. Co-written by Nora Ephron and directed by Mike Nichols.

The decontamination shower scene gets me every time.





Julia Roberts as Erin Brockovich (2000). Also based on a true story. Erin Brockovich stumbles into a legal assistant position at a going-broke law firm run by Ed Masry (an excellent Albert Finney). She also stumbles onto incriminating information that a large California power company is polluting the city's water supply and ultimately brings the company to its knees. The film was nominated for a slew of awards (42), both in the U.S. and abroad. Julia Roberts won an Oscar and a Golden Globe for best actress. Steven Soderbergh directed. Little known fact: Danny deVito was Executive Producer.





Sally Field as Norma Rae (1979).  Sally Field won seven best actress awards, including an Oscar, a Golden Globe and the Cannes Film Festival, for her portrayal of Norma Rae. Norma was an operator in a southern textile mill, working in deplorable conditions under hostile management, hostile mill owners, and even some of her co-workers who didn't want to lose their jobs. When a union organizer (Ron Leibman) comes to town, Norma sees an opportunity to do something worthwhile with her life and joins up with him.







Honorable mention: fictional characters.

Renee Zelwegger as Ruby Thewes in Cold Mountain (2003)
Jane Fonda as Kimberly Welles in The China Syndrome (1979)
Jodie Foster in Flightplan (2005), Panic Room (2002), The Brave One (2007)

Monday Movie Meme....On Politics

Today I am appearing as the Monday Movie Meme's first ever Guest Director over at The Bumbles Blog. Molly recently added a chat forum on her blog and finding volunteers for this gig was one of her chosen topics. She "reeled" me in hook, line and sinker and "made me an offer I couldn't refuse".  She knows I love movies, so it was a pretty easy arm-twisting. I perused her past topics and noticed that she had never done political movies, so that's what I chose. Why don't you come on over to Molly's place and see the movies that inspired me. If you would like to play along and tell us your favorites, you can pick up the widget over there and also leave a link to your post in the comments. And if you decide to play, please be kind and visit your fellow Meme participants.

Here are Molly's picks:

All the President's Men

Citizen Kane

The People vs. Larry Flynt

Napoleon Dynamite